"Lost & Found changed my life for the better"
“How I wish, how I wish you were here.” – Pink Floyd
That lyric from the iconic Pink Floyd song “Wish You Were Here” is appropriate when discussing the Neuberger family. Pink Floyd was Aaron Neuberger’s favorite band.
“Aaron’s love of Pink Floyd goes back to his dad and his grandpa,” said Olivia Neuberger, Aaron’s widow. “I remember the first time we sat down and watched a concert on TV. He was giddy like a little kid.”
Now, Olivia outfits her young daughters in Pink Floyd t-shirts and dresses to commemorate their dad, who died in October 2022 due to complications from Pancreatitis.
“I lost my best friend, my husband, my children’s dad,” Olivia said. “There is a huge hole in my heart and our house.”
While Aaron was in the intensive care unit, hospital officials informed Olivia about Lost & Found Grief Center, but she was initially resistant to seeking help.
“I thought I was too strong to need assistance,” Olivia said. “Little did I know that four weeks later, I would be sitting in my first group session while my girls attended the kids’ class.”
That first night of group at Lost & Found was terrifying for Olivia because she had to admit that Aaron was never coming back.
Olivia’s girls were both scared and sad on the first night at Lost & Found. Now, they would tell other kids about attending Lost & Found that despite their sadness, they will make new friends and have fun learning how to process their grief.
“Lost & Found taught me that it’s okay to grieve, to talk about how I’m feeling, and to grow,” Olivia said. “My life changed when Aaron died, but Lost & Found also changed my life for the better.”
When Olivia or his girls would get frustrated, Aaron would often reference another Pink Floyd song “Another Brick in the Wall.” Olivia recalls, “Aaron would say, ‘It’s just another brick in the wall. It’s just part of your path. Sometimes you have to go through the hard part to make a pretty path.’”
"I had hope that things would get better"
Nikki Moore describes her late husband, Jabe, as a chameleon. Jabe had several careers and pursued many hobbies. Most recently, he worked in energy management at Fort Leonard Wood, and in his free time, he played golf and pool.
Jabe was also a friendly guy who could turn an errand into a social event.
“He’d run to the store and be gone for an hour because he was talking to someone,” Nikki said. “Jabe would say, ‘God just sends me people, and they tell me things they wouldn’t normally tell someone else.’”
Jabe died in the summer of 2023 due to an enlarged heart. He was only 44. Jabe’s death left Nikki alone to parent their three daughters.
“He was my best friend,” Nikki said of her high school sweetheart. “I miss his input and having a partner to decide what is best for our girls.”
Some relatives told Nikki about Lost & Found Grief Center, and she attended the Caregivers Group while her daughters went to the Children, Middler, and Teen Groups.
“I was nervous that first night in group because I didn’t know what to expect,” Nikki said. “But seeing people who were farther along in their grief journeys gave me comfort because I had hope that things would get better.”
The Moores live in rural Webster County, and when group night rolls around twice a month for Nikki and her daughters, it would be easier for them to stay home rather than make the trek into Springfield. However, Nikki and her girls are committed to the process and regularly attend group sessions.
“I find so much strength at Lost & Found. You go to group and leave feeling lighter,” Nikki said. “Just to hear someone say they are struggling with the same things you are struggling with. Lost & Found helps keep you going.”
Nikki’s youngest daughter also found healing at Lost & Found, “You are in a safe environment and as time goes on it gets easier to talk about your person. I would tell anyone thinking about going to Lost & Found that the people at this place are super-duper nice, like, max level nice.”
Just as Jabe had a way of getting others to open up to him, Nikki and her daughters found a similar connection in their groups. Through Lost & Found, they discovered a place to share stories about their friendly husband and father. The man who could turn a simple errand into a heartfelt conversation. They keep Jabe’s memory alive through the bonds they are forming with their fellow participants.